Storm, the famous mascot for Thunderhawks Athletics at Confederation College, has recently gained sentience.

“There’s no one in there,” said Orion Atkinson warily early Tuesday morning as Storm began somehow scaling a 90 degree wall located outside of the Shuniah building. Puzzled, our reporter tried reaching out for comment from the mascot: “S̸̥͊a̵̠̣͝c̵̰͝r̸̹̂͆i̷͙̪͆͝f̸̓ͅḯ̴̡̟c̶̢̺͝ê̶̩͊ ̵̡͈̃̕t̸̤̓̃h̵̯͇̏̿e̵̖̓̚ ̶͛ͅc̶͕͗̈́h̸͎̞͆̚i̸̲̖̽l̶̪̑d̴̙͓̒ ̴͉͎̋͝-̵̢͛ ̶̞̎̃ͅs̶̙̀͆ǎ̶̝ͅt̴͆͜e̸̟̓ ̸̦͝m̷̱̍̇ẙ̴̖̳ ̴̙͈̒e̶̡̩̒t̴͕͌̎e̶͙͌͝ṙ̵̗͚̇n̴̘̠̍̋a̷͈͉̾l̸̹͔̄̾ ̷͖͋h̸̖̪̽́u̶̡͎̓n̷͈͒g̸̳͒e̵͍̽r̷͕͆̏.̸͖̥̕”.

Our reporter’s face then began melting. We were unable to fully understand Storm through the demonic undertones, but it’s safe to say they are out of commission temporarily.